Evolve Bank’s Data Breach Nightmare: 7.6 Million Alerted as LockBit Strikes

In a digital oopsie-daisy, Evolve Bank & Trust plays mailman to 7.6 million folks, delivering “Sorry, we got hacked” notes. LockBit ransomware gang’s latest cyber shenanigan turns out to be a click-happy employee boo-boo. Now, free credit monitoring is the new ‘my bad’ goody bag. #EvolveDataBreach

Hot Take:

It seems Evolve Bank & Trust decided to play a real-life game of ‘Trust Fall’ with their cybersecurity, and oh boy, did they fall hard. With 7.6 million folks now in the ‘thanks for your data’ club, courtesy of LockBit, it’s like Oprah’s favorite giveaway—except instead of cars, it’s personal info, and nobody’s cheering. And the winner of the “Most Clickable Employee” award goes to… the person who clicked the malicious link. Give that person a phish, they click for a day; teach them cybersecurity, and… well, hopefully, we avoid a sequel to this breach saga.

Key Points:

  • Evolve Bank & Trust is handing out ‘Oops, we did it again’ notices to 7.6 million individuals post-LockBit ransomware fiesta.
  • LockBit tried to catfish everyone as the U.S. Federal Reserve, but plot twist, they were just holding Evolve’s data hostage.
  • An employee with a click-happy finger gave LockBit the keys to the kingdom, leading to a nearly four-month-long cyber-squatter’s dream.
  • Evolve is doling out credit monitoring like Halloween candy—two years for U.S. residents and dark web monitoring for the international crowd.
  • Shopify dodges the breach bullet, denying data drama and blaming a third-party app for leaking user details. Suspense continues for other Evolve partners.

Need to know more?

The Breach Heard 'Round the World

Evolve's latest newsletter isn't about their new savings account—it's a 7.6 million subscriber special edition titled "We've Been Hacked." LockBit, the cyber equivalent of the kid who'd remind the teacher about homework, proudly spilled the beans that they hit the jackpot with Evolve's data. But hey, at least they're giving credit where credit is due, offering credit monitoring as a consolation prize. Better late than never?

'Click Me' Catastrophe

One Evolve employee's foray into 'Link Clicking 101' turned into a masterclass in triggering a data breach. This click led to a digital domino effect that opened the floodgates for LockBit to take a leisurely four-month tour of Evolve's digital assets. If only their curiosity had been piqued by a cybersecurity awareness course instead, we might not be here today.

Keeping Up with the Cyber-Kardashians

While Evolve plays catch-up with the fallout, they're now the digital Oprah, offering protective services like it's a prime-time giveaway. And the suspense builds for Evolve's partners, as everyone's on the edge of their seats waiting to see who'll be the next to declare, "We've been impacted too!" Stay tuned for what could be the most gripping reality show of the year.

Shopify Shimmies Out of the Spotlight

Shopify, meanwhile, is doing its best dance moves to sidestep the drama, shaking off accusations of a data breach faster than you can say "third-party app." They're pointing fingers and promising notifications, while 180,000 users are left wondering if their data is window-shopping on the dark web. It's the cyber version of "He said, she said," but with more at stake than just drama.

The Cliffhanger

As for Evolve's other partners, they're playing it cooler than a cucumber in a freezer. Will they step into the breach confessional or continue to maintain digital silence? Only time will tell if they'll join Evolve in the breach spotlight or if they've managed to dodge the digital bullet. In the meantime, grab your popcorn, because this cyber saga is far from over.

Tags: Credit Monitoring Services, Data Breach Notification, fintech security, LockBit Ransomware, Sensitive Data Exposure, Shopify incident, third-party app risk